How to Write a Birth Plan in Singapore (And Why I Call It Birth Preferences)

One of the most empowering things you can do before your birth in Singapore is put your wishes into words. Not because everything will go exactly as you write it it may not. But because the process of thinking it through, talking it through, and having it on paper changes something. It makes you the author of your birth story, not a passenger in it.

In this post I want to walk you through how to approach your birth preferences document — what to include, what to be realistic about in a Singapore hospital context, and how to use it effectively so that the people in that room actually know who you are and what matters to you before your baby arrives.

First why I say "birth preferences" and not "birth plan"

This is not just semantics. The word "plan" implies something fixed, something that either succeeds or fails. And birth as anyone who has been through it knows does not work that way. Labour is one of the most unpredictable experiences a human body goes through. Things change. Circumstances shift. What felt right at 32 weeks may feel completely different at 7cm dilated.

"Preferences" is a more honest word. It says: here is what I hope for, what I value, and what matters to me and I understand that we may need to adapt. It invites a conversation with your medical team rather than presenting a set of demands. And in Singapore's hospital environment, that tone makes an enormous difference to how your document is received.

It also protects you emotionally. If your birth deviates from your "plan," it can feel like failure. If it deviates from your "preferences," it simply means the situation called for something different and you were prepared enough to adapt with understanding rather than shock.

A birth preferences document is not a contract. It is a communication tool. It tells your nurses, your ob-gyn, and your doula who you are, what you value, and what kind of support you need — so that every person in that room can be more intentionally on your side.

Five honest truths about birth preferences in Singapore

Before we get into what to include, I want to share the realities I have learned from supporting families across Singapore's private hospitals Thomson Medical Centre, Mount Elizabeth Novena and Orchard, Gleneagles, and NUH. These are things I wish every family knew before they wrote a single word.

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1 -Keep it to one page nurses do not have time for more.
I know you have a lot to say. I know you have thought deeply about every aspect of this birth. But a busy labour ward nurse who picks up your document between patients needs to be able to read it in under two minutes. One page, clear sections, short sentences. The depth of your thinking stays in your preparation not all of it belongs on the page.

2 -Share it with your ob-gyn at a prenatal appointment not just on the day.
This is one of the most common mistakes families make. Walking into the delivery suite with a birth preferences document your ob-gyn has never seen creates friction at exactly the wrong moment. Share it at your 34–36 week appointment. Discuss it. Find out what is realistic within your hospital’s specific policies. Arrive on the day already aligned. Note: NUH and KKH ask you provider about the birth plan they often have a template one for you.

3- Your preferences can and should be allowed to change in labour.
Deciding before birth that you do not want an epidural is a valid preference. Asking for one at 5am after twelve hours of back labour is also a valid preference. Both versions of you deserve to be respected. Write your document from your values and your hopes not from a place of proving something to yourself or anyone else.

4 - Singapore hospitals have specific policies that shape what is realistic.
Water birth, for example, is only available at certain hospitals and comes with additional costs and eligibility requirements. Intermittent monitoring rather than continuous CTG may be offered differently across hospitals. Some hospitals allow both a partner and a doula in the room others have policies around this. Your birth preferences need to be written with your specific hospital’s context in mind, not from a generic template.

5 - A doula is the person who helps you navigate when things do not go to plan.
Your birth preferences document is a starting point. What happens when labour takes an unexpected turn, when a recommendation is made that you did not anticipate, when you are too deep in contractions to advocate for yourself that is where your doula steps in. We hold your preferences in mind when you cannot. ”

What to include in your birth preferences document

Think of your document as having a few clear sections each one giving your birth team a specific piece of information about who you are and what you need. Here is how I guide families through it.

Who is with you

Name your birth partner and your doula clearly at the top. In most Singapore private hospitals, both a partner and a doula can be present in the delivery room — but please confirm this directly with your ob-gyn or care provider before the day. Do not assume it is automatically permitted. Most are supportive, but it is important to have that conversation explicitly at a prenatal appointment so everyone is aligned before you arrive in labour.

Your birth environment

What kind of space helps you feel calm and focused? Dim lighting, music, freedom to move, a birth ball, access to the shower or bath these are all things worth stating. Singapore private hospitals are generally accommodating of environment preferences. Some families bring a small speaker, an oil diffuser, or familiar items from home. Your room should feel as much like yours as possible.

Labour support and movement

Do you want to be free to move, change positions, use water for pain relief? Do you prefer to be offered suggestions about positions, or left to find your own way with guidance available? How involved do you want your partner to be physically — hands-on, or close but giving you space? These details help everyone in the room understand how to support you rather than manage you.

Pain relief preferences

This is one of the most important sections — and one of the most misunderstood. Your preferences around pain relief are not a pass or fail test. State what you would like to try first, what you are open to, and under what circumstances you would like certain options offered or not offered. For example: "I would like to try breathing, movement, and water first. Please do not offer an epidural unless I ask — but if I ask, please support me without question." That framing gives you agency in both directions.

Interventions, your questions and values

Rather than listing everything you want to avoid, consider framing this section around your decision-making values. For example: "Before any intervention, please explain what is happening, why it is being recommended, and what the alternatives are. We would like time to ask questions unless there is an emergency." This tells your team how you want to be communicated with which is far more useful than a list of refusals.

If a caesarean is needed

Even if you are hoping for a vaginal birth, it is worth thinking through your preferences for a caesarean both planned and emergency. In Singapore's private hospitals, caesarean rates are among the highest in Asia, so this is not a distant possibility. Can your partner be present? Is there music that matters to you? Is a gentle caesarean or family-centred caesarean something you would like to discuss with your ob-gyn? Having thought about this in advance means you are not making these decisions in crisis.

Third stage, cord and placenta

Do you have preferences around delayed cord clamping? Would you like your partner to cut the cord if possible? What are your wishes regarding the placenta? These are things many families do not think about until the moment arrives having them written down means your team already knows.

The section that matters most to me and why

Of everything in a birth preferences document, the section I return to again and again with every family I work with is this one. Not the pain relief. Not the interventions. This:

Skin-to-skin contact & your baby's first moments

The moment your baby is born whoever is in that room, whatever has happened in the hours before deserves to be protected. Write clearly that you would like your baby placed on your chest immediately after birth, before any routine procedures where possible. That you would like time uninterrupted, unhurried time to meet your baby. That assessments and measurements can wait. That the first hour of your baby's life outside the womb belongs first to the two of you.

In most Singapore hospitals this is increasingly supported but it needs to be explicitly stated. It does not happen automatically. And if you have had a caesarean, skin-to-skin in the operating theatre sometimes called a gentle or family-centred caesarean is something worth discussing with your ob-gyn at Thomson Medical, Mount Elizabeth, NUH, or Gleneagles specifically, as policies vary.

This is the section I believe matters most. Because whatever happens before, this moment your baby on your chest, your heartbeat under theirs is the moment your birth story becomes a love story. It deserves to be written down and protected.

“Your birth preferences document is not about controlling your birth. It is about showing up to it as yourself clear, informed, and known.”

How to actually use your birth preferences document

Writing it is only half the work. Here is how to make it count on the day.

Discuss it with your ob-gyn at your 34–36 week appointment. Go through it together. Ask what is feasible at your specific hospital. Make adjustments based on that conversation. Arrive on your due date already aligned with your medical team not presenting surprises at the wrong moment.

Give a copy to every person in the room. Your partner, your doula, the admitting nurse, your ob-gyn. Do not assume anyone has read it or been briefed by someone else. In a busy Singapore hospital on a busy day, the clearest communication wins.

Keep it positive and collaborative in tone. "We would love to" reads very differently from "we refuse to." Your birth team are on your side. Write to them as allies, not as obstacles. The tone of your document shapes the tone of the room.

Let your doula hold it when you cannot. Deep in active labour, you will not be re-reading your birth preferences document. Your doula will. That is part of what we are there for to know your wishes.

How I work with families on their birth preferences at Papaya Wellness

I want to be honest about something: I do not hand families a template and send them home to fill it in. And I do not write their birth preferences for them. Both of those approaches would be missing the point entirely.

Here is how I actually work with the families I support:

We start with education. In our prenatal sessions together, we explore what birth actually looks like and feels like — the real, embodied experience of it, not the sanitised version. We go through the different phases of labour, what your body is doing in each one, and how it might feel. We explore all the options for managing discomfort both natural approaches like movement, water, breathing, positioning, and counter-pressure, and medical options like gas and air, pethidine, and epidural analgesia. We talk about how each one works, what it feels like, what it means for your labour, and how it fits with different birth visions.

Only once you have that foundation once you actually understand what you are choosing between — do we move into preferences. At that point I share some sample documents with you. Not to copy, but to inspire. To give you a sense of language, of structure, of what other families have found important. You read them, you notice what resonates and what does not, and then you create your own version.

In your words.

Reflecting your values.

Your hopes.

Your specific situation.

My role is never to speak for you it is to support you to speak for yourself. On the day of your birth, when you are deep in labour and a decision needs to be made, I am not there to answer for you. I am there to make sure you have the space, the information, and the confidence to answer for yourself.

That is a fundamental difference. And it is one I feel strongly about. Your birth story belongs to you. Your voice is the one that shapes it.

This process education first, samples for inspiration, your own document in your own voice takes time. It is one of the reasons I encourage families to reach out early, ideally between 16 and 28 weeks, so we have the space to do this work properly before the third trimester is upon us.

Frequently asked questions about birth plans in Singapore

• Do Singapore hospitals accept birth plans?

  Yes — all major private hospitals in Singapore, including Thomson Medical Centre, Mount Elizabeth Novena and Orchard, Gleneagles, Raffles, KKH and NUH, accept birth preferences documents. The key is to share it with your ob-gyn before the day of your birth, not just on arrival at the labour ward. Discussing it at your 34–36 week appointment gives your team time to note your preferences and flag anything that may conflict with hospital policy so you can discuss it calmly in advance.

• How long should a birth plan be in Singapore?

  One page maximum. Labour ward nurses are managing multiple patients and need to be able to read your document quickly and clearly. Use short sentences, clear section headings, and focus on what matters most to you. The depth of your thinking belongs in your preparation and in conversations with your doula — not all on the page.

• What should I include in a birth plan for a Singapore hospital?

  At minimum: who is present , your environment preferences, how you would like to be supported during labour, your pain relief approach, how you want decisions communicated to you, your preferences for the third stage (cord clamping, placenta), and most importantly — your wishes for immediate skin-to-skin contact and your baby's first moments. If a caesarean is possible, include preferences for that scenario too.

• Can I have both a birth partner and a doula in the delivery room in Singapore?

  At most Singapore hospitals, yes — both a birth partner and a doula can be present. Thomson Medical Centre, Mount Elizabeth Novena and Orchard, KKH, NUH, Raffles and Gleneagles generally allow this. However, it is essential to confirm this directly with your ob-gyn or care provider at a prenatal appointment before the day of your birth. Do not leave this conversation until you are in labour. Most care providers are supportive, but having explicit confirmation in advance means there are no surprises when you arrive at the ward.

• What if my birth doesn't go according to my birth plan?

  This is why I use the word "preferences" rather than "plan." If your birth takes an unexpected direction — an unplanned caesarean, a change in pain relief, a different timeline — it does not mean your document failed. It means birth is unpredictable. What your preferences document does is ensure that the people around you know your values and your wishes, so that even in an unexpected situation, decisions are made with you, not around you. A doula's role is specifically to hold your preferences when circumstances change.

• Is skin-to-skin contact possible after a caesarean in Singapore?

  Increasingly, yes — but it needs to be explicitly requested and discussed with your ob-gyn in advance. A family-centred or gentle caesarean, where skin-to-skin contact happens in the operating theatre, is offered at some Singapore hospitals but is not standard practice everywhere. Discuss this specifically with your ob-gyn and include it clearly in your birth preferences document.

Ready to write your birth preferences?

Building a meaningful birth preferences document takes more than filling in a template it takes a real conversation about who you are and what kind of birth experience you want to carry with you. That is exactly what we do together in our prenatal sessions at Papaya Wellness. Let's talk.